IF YOU CAN’T CONTROL WHAT’S INSIDE, YOU WILL NEVER HAVE ANY SHOT OF CONTROLLING ANYTHING OUTSIDE OF YOURSELF. There’s a story men tell themselves. Maybe at 2 a.m., staring at the ceiling, with their jaws tight, and mind running laps. The story is some version of this: if I could just get the right job, […]

Sometimes I want to watch basketball, eat some crappy food, then binge a Netflix show, and not be emotionally available to anyone. Not my wife. Not my business partner. Not my family. Not my community. Just me, my couch, TV, and a bag of chips or cookies that I absolutely do not need. And there’s […]

You Went to One Retreat. What Did You Expect. Are men’s retreats worth it? Depends entirely on what you do when you get home.   A few weeks ago I drove to meet a guy for lunch. He lives in another state, but he’s in California for the week. He reached out. He came on […]

A few years ago, I started making sourdough bread. I still make it every few weeks. It’s really good. Really good. Honestly. People come over, eat it, make the noises people make when bread is really good, and say things like, “Oh my god.” “Are you kidding me?” “You made this?” And somewhere in those […]

There’s a conversation I have with men all the time, at retreats, in coaching sessions, and at men’s groups. It usually happens on a first call or around the fire when he feels safe to open up. He talks about his successful business, a good income, a good house, and a family he loves. By […]

THE ANGER TRAP How We Keep Voting for Our Own Disaster Imagine this: You’re at a restaurant. The service has been terrible. For years it’s been terrible. Wrong orders, cold food, and a manager who’s on “vacation” when it seems like the whole place is burning down. You’re pissed. Rightfully so. You and every other […]

There’s a man and a moment I think about often. We were sitting around a fire at a men’s retreat. It was his first men’s retreat. A circle of men, late into the night, a big burning fire, and the kind of quiet that only exists when people have stopped performing and started telling the […]

So… About the Man Bun. Men’s work has a branding problem. Let’s talk about it. Let’s get something out of the way. Men’s work has a branding problem. You know exactly what I’m talking about. Close your eyes and picture it: a guy in a wide-brimmed hat that costs more than your first car. Linen […]

I spent my twenties building other people’s dreams. Sixteen years in the restaurant industry. Over twenty locations opened across the country, brands, mom-and-pops, concepts that needed someone to show up, build the team, create the culture, and make it work. I was good at it. Really good. The kind of skillset and mindset that was […]